Unexpected

My ex came over yesterday to help me install some shelves I got at IKEA around the condo. I promised to make his favorite, chicken enchiladas, for his trouble. I was almost finished preparing the meal when I got a text from Daniel. He was on his way over to bring me a surprise.

I said okay but warned him I had company over and was about to eat. He didn't seemed bothered by that at all. Plus, this way I wouldn't have as many leftovers to pig out on :)

He was there just as I was warming up some queso, so I asked Jackson to get the door. The bowl had just started turning in the microwave when I heard raised, angry voices coming from the living room.

"What are you really doing here? Haven't you destroyed her life enough?"

"Just who the fuck do you think you are?" I came around the corner to see my ex shouting that last thing at Daniel.

"What's going on here?" I asked, looking from one furious face to the other.

"You didn't tell me HE was the company, Abby," Daniel spat and kept his eyes locked with Jackson's.

"Who the hell is this guy? And why am I not putting my fist through his face right now?"

That set Daniel off and he flew at my ex, but I squeezed between them before a punch could he thrown.

"You both better calm down or I'm kicking you out."

They were still fuming, but at least they'd turned human again instead of Neanderthal idiots.

I explained to each of them what the other was doing there. Daniel was not pleased at all to discover that I had been telling the truth about just how close I still was to my ex. Jackson wasn't thrilled to meet someone who was possibly screwing his wife.

Jackson wanted to leave but I insisted he take a big portion of the food with him.

Then, Daniel and I were alone...and it was awkward because he was truly pissed at me and I didn't understand why.

I turned around, after shutting the door behind Jackson, and Daniel was standing over me, less than a foot away.

I gasped.

"I thought you couldn't stand each other," he whispered. There was an emotional edge to his voice but I couldn't decipher it.

I stared at him for a long time before answering. "He was everything to me for 10 years, Daniel. Just because we don't make each other happy all the time doesn't mean I don't love him anymore."

He seemed to be processing this for the moment. When he finally eased out of my space, he spoke. I brought you something."

"Oh yeah," I said with relieved chuckle. "So where is it?"

Daniel smiled then. "In the other room. I left it in the hall when I started...when I met your ex-husband. But then I went to retrieve it later."

When he finally revealed it, I was extremely moved.

"It's a painting of the Aramaic word for 'beginning'." I looked at him in awe. "I thought you might appreciate it," he added shyly.

"My gosh, are you kidding?" I exclaimed. "I love it! It is perfect, thank you." I wrapped my arms around him and kissed him deeply.

Before we could get started he pulled away and disentangles himself from my arms. "I should get going."

"You have to be somewhere?" Could my voice sound any more desperate?

"No, but if something were...to happen," he said and glanced at me warily, "then it might feel like I was getting paid for my gift."

I couldn't believe he would actually think something like that! "Daniel!"

"I know," he interrupted. He moved us over to sit on the bed. "This," he gestured at the two of us, "is very different than anything I've ever been through before. My emotions are already more insane than I can really tolerate. I just don't want to rock that boat any further. Okay?"

For some reason this made me very sad. All I could do was nod.

"God, you are really making this hard!"

"Excuse me?" I had definitely missed something.

"That face! Do you have any idea how beautiful you are?"

I stared at him blankly. What was he talking about?

"I do feel bad about ruining your lunch, so can I take you out to dinner tonight?"

Just seeing how happy he was at the idea made me flush. How could I say "no"?

**************************

Daniel took me to my favorite seafood restaurant, Pier 34, which was right near his home. I stuffed myself on shrimp and crab legs and really really good margaritas. So good in fact, that I got a tad tipsy after just one. And for me, tipsy turns me into a vey brave, very HORNY lady.

The booth we were in was secluded and dark and so after the waitress took our plates and was busy getting our dessert orders, I had some fun.

Daniel was talking about some guy at work and I reached under the table and started dancing my way up his leg until I found his zipper.

He gasped as I yanked it down. "Abby, what...?"

"Shhh...." I laughed and reached inside until I found it. And HOO BOY, he was already ready to go! My fingers wrapped around his rock hard length and pumped a couple times.

He sucked in a hard breath. "Abby, I swear to---" his words cut off as I rubbed my thumb over his tip, feeling the slick moisture that was beginning to seep out. His hand suddenly covered mine. "If you continue this, then I will have to take you out back and fuck your brains out on the street."

"Is that a promise?". I smiled widely.

His eyes smoldered as they held mine. I worked his wetness around, lubing up the shaft. I squeezed hard as I got down to the base and then released it to cup his balls. The first time I touched them his knees hit the table so loud everyone in the restaurant seemed to turn and stare.

I still wasn't done playing when the waitress came back, but she didn't seem to suspect. I ate my cheesecake with one hand like nothing was going on. I even "mmm'd" to make him suffer a litle more. I was evil.

Just as I was about to finish the job, he pushed me away violently and scooted a few feet down on the booth. I watched him slyly readjust himself and then he threw some money down on the table. Before I could ask questions he yanked me up and pulled me in front of him. As he pushed us out the front door, the poking on my lower back made it clear what I was helping him hide with my body.

Instead of steering us toward his car, though, he began pushing me toward the alley behind the retaurant. My heart rate accelerated dramatically. Was he serious?

"Daniel, where are you taking me?"

"I warned you what would happen if you kept going...". He rounded the corner and kept pushing me forward until I was up against the brick wall. Daniel was unzipping his pants and, once finished, let his impressive dick hang out, I could nearly see it pulsating.

Then he yanked down my capris and panties in one motion. I yelled but he clamped his hand over it mouth, forcing my head back against the brick. Then I was lifted off the ground, my legs pushed up around his waist. His cock speared into me as our bodies mashed against the wall.

"Oh fuck, fuck! FUCK!" I kept screaming but his mouth kept it from being more than muffled gobbledeegook.

He was pounding me so hard I could feel where the brick was slashing holes in my shirt. "Jesus, Abby!"

Our sweaty bodies grinder harder and I could hear him fighting to talk. "I'm...gonna cum...inside you!" And then he was. For the first time I realized, he didn't use a condom.

He held me like that, up against the wall, until he could breathe normally. When he let me go I collapsed to the ground, confused.

Daniel was beside me immediately. "What's the matter, Abby? Are you hurt?"

"I don't know.". He helped me get redressed and I used that moment to figure it what happened. The sex had been phenomenal. There was no doubt about that. But now...?

He wrapped an arm around my waist to walk me to the car and I heard him gasp.

"Jesus, Abby, you're bleeding!"

"Oh yeah." Now I remembered. My back.

He was near hysterics and wrapped his jacket around me, ushering me into his car. When we arrived at his place, he took me into his bathroom and pulled off my clothes, making me sit in a warm bath while he cleaned my wounds.

It wasn't as bad as he made it to be, but I knew how guilty he was feelig so I let him continue. He dressed me in some of his sweats and told me there was absolutely no way he was letting me leave tonight in my condition.

So was it my fault then if I woke up at 2 and attacked him in his sleep? He had snuggled against my back during the night and I could feel his hard-on through the t-shirt I had on. I reached back and stroked him before rolling over and kissing his chest and down to his cock. He groaned but didn't wake up. He started mumbling louder, but still incoherently as I took him in my mouth. I licked and sucked for awhile adding his balls in to the mix every now and then. It was when I licked the head while pumping his shaft that he finally woke.

Once he realized what was happening he grabbed my head and started fucking back into my mouth. I could tell he was getting close and I stopped pulling as hard as I could away from him. He had this very lost, puppy-dog expression on his face but that quickly changed to arousal when I yanked off my clothes. I jumped on top of him, latched onto his headboard, and rode as hard as I could. He sucked at my nipples as they bounced around in his face. When he bit one I nearly came. It took me longer than him but finally we both found release.

And for the first time, I stayed the night.

I wonder how much that will cost me.

Good Times :)

Okay, so last night I met up with Ty (not his real name, remember!), the baseball player, for dinner. I was REALLY nervous because he was a quasi-celebrity and going out with someone I was a fan of was just...very strange.

He was BEYOND cool, though. I tried not to sound like the biggest tomboy ever, but I can't help how much I have always worshiped MLB. I figured the last thing he would want to talk about was his job so we talked about other things like traveling, hobbies, and other basic getting-to-know-you crap, lol.

We both love Italian so we met at this little hole-in-the-wall place that I had been many times before right around the corner from my condo. He showed up looking like a model for Banana Republic or something. We recognized each other from the gym (and the countless times I'd drooled over him on TV) and he greeted me with a big hug...such a sweet guy! He looked like he had stolen his outfit out of Matthew McConaughey's closet: loose-fit khakis with a nearly see-through white linen shirt over a white tank and brown leather flip-flops. It suited his laid-back personality perfectly.

I had picked the restaurant because it is very cozy and I knew he probably wouldn't be overwhelmed there by fans wanting to get his autograph or something. And, I was right :)

We had a corner booth in the back, very private and semi-romantic. He wanted to know about my situation and I was blunt about my divorce and close relationship to my ex (excluding the sordid, sexual details). Even though Ty was a few years older than me, he had never been married to anyone but baseball. Once we got that business out of the way, the conversation picked up to lighter topics (I made fun of his GORGEOUSLY SEXY shaved head and perfectly groomed facial hair). He's such a positive fun-loving guy and, even after we'd been finished with our meal for awhile, I didn't want the night to end.

We decided to walk down by the river and there was a small outdoor concert featuring some local alt bands that we stopped at. Again, the conversation was easy and I found myself just drawn to him. I don't even know how it came to be. One minute we were just sitting on the cool grass laughing and the next...boom! His face was an inch from mine and it just seemed so...like gravity or something. Gosh, that sounds so dumb, but I don't know how else to explain it.

Kissing him was just the next logical step...ugh, how do I explain this without sounding like some bad teen-romance novel?!!?!?! It was wonderful! And so sweet. And warm, lol.

And it didn't need anything more than that. We kissed and held hands as we walked back to the restaurant. He insisted that I text him when I got home since I would be walking alone. So I did, and he called right after. We actually watched a movie on the phone together!!! It was Dumb and Dumber (I know, right???) and we were both in tears from laughing so hard.

This morning I woke up with a text from him thanking me for having dinner and that he had tickets for me to come see him pitch on Tuesday night. He told me he wanted to hear my critique of his performance (since I'd failed at my attempt to not talk about baseball and slammed some of his teammates---which he thoroughly enjoyed, laughing heartily at my intensity over some of the blatant mistakes I could see them making) first-hand...which meant a second date :)

Okay, so slight subject change...

Daniel Update: He still is acting normal around me, so no weirdness after the other night which I am so grateful for. In fact, he and Jayne are going with me to the game Tuesday. Don't know how that will work, but no strings, right?

And I'm thinking of getting a new car :)

YES!!!!!!

Okay so I got a text yesterday from a certain baseball player I trained not so long ago. They have a homestand starting Tuesday but his role as a pitcher makes it so that they are sending him back ahead of the rest of the team. So guess who has a date with him tonight????

ME!!!!!

I am so excited! He seems like a cool person to hang with and I ADORE the team he plays on!

More to come on that...

Speaking of baseball, last night I watched the game at a local sports bar with Daniel and a couple of his guy friends. We had fun and his friends were hilarious. We played trivia (which they were way too good at) and darts (I rock there). Daniel drove me home but didn't ask to come up and I didn't want to invite him...I was sorta tired, I guess...LOL

Hard to let go

Yesterday, my ex picked me up from work because my car was getting some routine maintenance and detail work done. Remember, we are still very good friends and, of course, he will always be the love of my life.

So I was giving him a more in-depth tour of my condo since he'd only been there once before when I was shopping for it.

"I'd like to repay a debt now if that's all right."

I whirled on him, having been in the middle of showing him my kitchen. "What?" I gasped.

He took my hand and pulled me over to the extra-tall table and chair set in the breakfast nook. He pulled down my jogging pants and boy-cut gray underwear and then helped me into the chair. At this height he barely had to bend down to put his mouth on me.

A stream of expletives flowed from my lips when he put his mouth on me. I tangled my fingers in his hair, desperate for somethingto cling to while he sucked and nipped at my most sensitive spots. It was a ritual he'd perfected over the last decade. His tongue was devastating and I was screaming as I came.

He stood with a wild look in his eye and pulled me to the bedroom I'd shown him before. The sex we had over the next hour was just pure fucking. He knows exactly how hard to be with me and what every scream and moan means.

We did it twice on the bed---each of us taking turns on top, once with me pushed over the bed while he stood and fucked me from behind, once in the tub---to break it in, and then we just laid together in bed.

I don't know what got it started, but it suddenly turned emotional.

"That was really nice," he commented with a sigh.

I played with his chest hair. "It definitely was."

"I miss you a lot, you know."

I laughed at his matter-of-fact tone. "I miss you, too. But we made the right choice."

"You did," he mumbled.

"Excuse me?" What the hell was he talking about??? "Two people signed the divorce papers, remember?"

"I remember not wanting to lose you. But I also knew I couldn't make you happy."

I turned so that I was facing him, propped up on my elbows. "Don't."

"It's true, Abby. I'm just happy we can still have moments like these.". He smiled sweetly, his eyes were becoming moist.

"I still love you..." He would never know how much pain his pain still caused me.

His hand squeezed mine. "And that's enough."

Monday, Monday...

I worked with Daniel that morning. There was no smirk or sarcasm when he talked to me. He was his normal, happy, laid-back self. We picked on each other and joked around. At lunch, he and I went to get food for everyone and there was never an awkward moment.

No strings was DEFINITELY an awesome thing!!!

Our shifts were over early---like 2:30pm---so some of us decided to spend the afternoon at Dave & Buster's for happy hour!!! Let me just say that I rock at skeet ball and the free throw games!

It was about 6 when everyone started leaving. And, yes, Daniel asked me to come over. We got a pineapple and mushroom pizza from Mama's (OMG it's heavenly!!!) and watched some old episodes of The Office.

"You know, Pam & Jim made it work..." he said innocently before stuffing his mouth with a monstrous bite.

"Yeah," I admitted. "But give 'em a few years to figure out why they can't stand each other. Oh, and they're fictional!"

He stared at me, a piece of pizza hanging limp from his hand.

"What?" I asked after a few moments of dead silence.

"You are just so...bitter.". He shook his head and then looked at me again---only this time with pity.

"It's taken you this long to figure that out?". I laughed without humor. "And I'm not really bitter so much as experienced. That's just reality, Daniel."

He muttered something like, "Doesn't have to be..." and I pretended not to hear.

We had finished the pizza and were lounging together on his sofa when things started.

First, he began rubbing my bare legs (I was wearing my athletic shorts from work) and then he was playing with my hand, kissing it.

"What are you doing?"

"You don't like it?" His tone made it sound like a request, but he never paused.

"I didn't say that."

He just chuckled. "So you like being touched by me?". I rolled my eyes, refusing to give in to his obvious plea for a compliment. "I want to touch you everywhere..." he whispered.

Wow. That was all it took for me to turn into putty---Damn him!

I pushed him down on the sofa and we were making out like two horny teenagers. We stayed clothed for quite awhile, actually, before Daniel sat up, grabbed me, and threw me over his shoulder, caveman-style.

"Oh my gosh!" I was mortified because my weight was far from insubstantial. "Daniel, put me down right now!"

"Okay then," he laughed. We were in his bedroom and in two seconds I was dumped unceremoniously on the bed.

We pulled off each other's clothes quickly (he insisted on the condom again) and, instead of getting between my legs like I thought he would, Daniel rolled me on my stomach. All I could think was "oh my gosh, YES!!!"

He pushed my upper body down on the bed and positioned himself between my legs before grabbing a handful of my hair. "Does that hurt?" he asked flatly. I shook my head without speaking. "Good," he growled and then rammed himself into me.

I grabbed his sheets tightly as his pistoning rocked my whole body. My toes curled with pleasure as this was by far my favorite position. His grip got tighter on my hair and his thrusts got much faster and stronger.

It was over seconds later.

I waited until his breathing got deeper before moving to get my clothes. As I sat up, his hand shot out and grabbed my arm. "Stay with me."

I turned around to look at him and his expression nearly did me in---nearly. "I can't. You know that."

"Why not?"

I was remembering why I had protested to having sex with him in the first place. "Because. Dammit, Daniel, you know why!"

I tried to pull away from him, sitting there naked just made the argument worse, but he just gripped tighter. "I don't want you to go..."

"I know...and that's why I have to." I turned to face him in an effort for him to grasp the seriousness of this. "I don't want to hurt you."

"I'm not asking to be your boyfriend, Abby. I just want to hold you." He released my arm.

How could any girl say no to that? I sure didn't know how.

Around 2 that morning, I was confident that he was asleep sound enough for me to leave without disturbing him. There was no way I would allow us to wake up together. Very bad idea.

Tuesday morning I got a text from him that was only two words long.

"Thank you."

*****************
I have made it extremely clear to him what I don't want from a man right now. I just hope he gets that I'm not right for him. He deserves someone who will give herself to him exclusively...and that's just not in my power right now.

Weekend madness

So I went to work late Friday afternoon and had just two clients. Daniel was there and I knew facing him after my abrupt exit would be somewhat awkward. But he was completely normal around me. Not angry or stand-offish at all. Just...like Daniel. I was overjoyed at this!

Maybe there was some way we could be more than friends without the strings that I was running from.

We finished our client sessions around the same time and walked out to our cars together. We talked about our plans for that weekend and I told him that I would be going dancing tomorrow night with a friend. I knew this would be a way to decipher whether Daniel's behavior around me was genuine. He shrugged, seemingly indifferent, and said he was heading out to the clubs tomorrow with some friends as well.

It was a huge relief.

Pedro picked me up, Saturday night, and took me to a salsa bar on the east side. It was loud and full of sweaty bodies, but the atmosphere was just dripping in sexuality. He knew the owners but we were pretty much in our own little world most of the night. If I hadn't had the margaritas, I may not have been brave enough for what he had in mind...

Dancing together just wasn't getting us close enough anymore and Pedro whispered for me to follow him. His ties to the owners meant no one gave us a hard time when we snuck into the backroom behind the bar and were finally alone.

"Abigail," he breathed as he kissed his way down my bare chest---the dress I wore was cut extremely low---"you bring out the wild man in me."

"So you don't usually bring all your dance partners back here?" I laughed and he kissed me, pushing me back against a sink area.

"Abby?" he whispered in his hotter than hell Latin voice. "Have you ever, uh...?". He nudged my back against the counter again.

If I hadn't been wet before that certainly did the trick. "Are you serious?"

"Is that a no?" He had pulled back and was studying my wide-eyes, obviously not seeing any opposition in them. "Well, neither have I."

And then he grabbed me around the waist, lifting me so that I was sitting on top of it. Then he had my skirt around my waist, unzipping himself quickly, before pushing my thong aside.

"What if someone walks in?" I gasped.

His thrust was my answer. I felt his soft hand press hard over my mouth as I screamed from his surprise attack. He stopped immediately.

"Are you okay?" he asked, concern evident on his brow.

I nodded, wrapping my legs around him as tight as I could.

This time he was the one gasping as I latched onto his neck. Someone could have walked in and started a fire and I would never have known. Pedro was as rhythmic in sex as he was in dancing. Obviously, we had to be careful since I was balanced precariously on the edge of the counter. A couple of minutes into it, he grabbed my thigh and moved my leg so that my knee was thrown over his shoulder. The angle was perfect and I clutched his back so tight that, if it hadn't been for his shirt I would have drawn blood.

I don't know if my orgasm sent him over, but he was cumming less than a minute after I had.

We went back out to the dance floor like nothing happened. I couldn't stop smiling as he whisked me around the floor. An hour later, we headed out. I got a text from Jayne saying she wanted us to come hang out with her and Mandy at the Forum. Pedro liked the idea and, anyway, it was just a few blocks from my condo.

We got in easily and Pedro went to get us some tequila shots.

"Abby!" The voice was NOT the one I expected and my heart beat through my chest.

"Daniel." I tried to smile genuinely.

He grabbed me up in a fierce hug. It felt wonderful. So why did I feel like I had done something wrong?

"Why didn't you tell me you were coming here?" His eyes lit up his whole face as he beamed down at me.

"I..."--what the fuck was I going to say?--"My friend and I just got here. We went dancing over at La Casa on the east side."

"Oh, well that's cool. C'mon I'll buy you a drink." He said, grabbing my hand.

I dug my heels in, resisting despite the happiness I felt inside just from his presence. "That's okay, my friend is getting me one right now."

His expression fell for half a second before he had hidden it. "Do I know them?"

I could tell by "them" he wanted me to reassure him that it was a girl but I wasn't going to lie, and I could see Pedro approaching quickly with a strange look on his face. That's when I realized I was still holding hands with Daniel. "Uh, no, I don't think so."

"Abby?" Pedro quickly assessed the situation, but if he was feeling territorial it didn't show on his face. I felt the relief shoot through me.

I moved to stand next to Pedro, and introduced the two men. They shook hands and Pedro smiled suavely (he just couldn't help it) while Daniel just looked...expressionless.

"Here is your drink," he said and handed it and a small lime wedge. "Salud!" he exclaimed with a wink and we downed the shot together.

Daniel was staring at me as if waiting for this little show to be over.

"I need to find Jayne and Mandy," I remembered suddenly---though it was also a great excuse to break this awkward moment.

"I just saw them upstairs."

It took a little convincing but Daniel agreed to come hang out with us. Jayne threw me a sympathetic look when she saw Daniel and Pedro were trailing behind me. Luckily some of Daniel's boys were there so it didn't get too awkward sitting there altogether.

And let's just say I was a little surprised when Daniel asked me to go downstairs and dance with him. Pedro was very gracious in his behavior towards him---I mean, I was *technically* on a date with him.

When we got to the horde of bodies that made up the invisible "dance floor" he grabbed my hand and weaved us through the crowd into the very center. Then he wrapped me up tight and started moving to the remix of a Britney song. I kept waiting for him to say something, but he kept his eyes fixed on mine with his mouth firmly shut in a smirk.

When the song ended, I moved to turn around and head back but he yanked me backwards---nearly causing me to fall---into his body. "In a hurry to get somewhere?" he questioned, bitterness clear in his tone for the first time since before we'd had sex.

I shook my head, knowing my voice would never make it to his ears facing the direction I was.

"Good because I'm not ready for you to leave yet." His voice was nearly a growl and I tried to turn around, but he held me hard to his body. "I don't know who that is up there, and I really don't give a shit. I saw how you looked at me and I saw how you looked at him. And I know you still want me."

For some reason, his confidence gave me the shivers despite the sweat that rolled down my back from the body heat of the club.

His hands roamed freely and I leaned into his every touch, enjoying it too much when he finally touched his lips to my skin. It was so wrong that I should be allowing him to turn me on---his smooth lips were sucking my neck in my ULTIMATE favorite spot---when I had just had sex not three hours before with another man...

But isn't that the choice I made when I laid the ground rules?

When the dance(s) were over, he walked me back upstairs and laid back against the couch as if he owned the world. I sat with Pedro the rest of the evening before he took me back home.

The question about ground rules is what kept me from sleeping with Pedro that night...there was a lot I needed to sort out and Pedro's charm was weakening every defense I could think of so I promised to call and insisted I could walk myself up to my condo.

Sunday I slept hard and went shopping with my family. We spent the day chilling, watching baseball and just having a great time together. It was exactly what I needed before I had to face my "other" life again.

Daniel text me late Sunday night and asked to keep me company that night, but I declined claiming sleep deprivation...after leaving with Pedro, I didn't know what he would make of that comment. He never let on either way.

Yesterday...well, that's my next post :)

Details

Well, I wasn't going to go into it but...here goes.

We arrived at his place and he steered me straight to the bedroom. We were both EXTREMELY drunk. I have to make that known before you read any further. I do have feelings for Daniel---I'm not blind to that. But I also know I am absolutely NOT ready to be in a serious relationship...why am I stalling??? I don't know!

Let me start by saying one thing that stands out clearly from my drunken memory of that night. Daniel naked is an awe-inspiring sight. The man is 6'3, muscled without looking overly so, tanned, and with just enough chest hair to be sexy. And then there's his cock... Wow. That's all I can say.

So we got into his bedroom which was metrosexually decorated. Very nice. We fell onto the queen size bed and he quickly divested me of my long tropical colored skirt and tank and then proceeded to pounce on me---while he remained dressed---kissing, licking, and sucking every inch that wasn't covered by my bra and panties.

He slowly kissed his way down my stomach before sliding off my panties. I bucked hard as he tongued and sucked my clit. His hands squeezed my breasts hard before he yanked on my nipple through the lace of my bra. The skill of his mouth and my anticipation brought me to a climax in a few short minutes.

I remember how pleasant his heavy warmth was after i finally got him out of his clothes. He practically ripped off my bra before putting his mouth there, too. There was a quick discussion before I acquiesced to him wearing a condom. And then he slipped inside...I was so wet that he went in with no problem---despite his thickness :)

Daniel fucks very, VERY hard when he gets close and I still have no clue how his headboard is undamaged---or my spine for that matter. What I do know is I have neve seen a drunk man cum that hard before. It literally knocked the breath out of me. And then, he collapsed.

And I snuck away.

Mixed drinks...and feelings

The thing that I had tried so hard to prevent --to avoid getting hurt-- finally happened.

I knew it could be amazing, but I also know how it will have to end...and it won't be pretty.

Daniel had been acting strange around me all week. Ever since our conversation, he had been looking at me with a smug expression. Almost like a leer...it was really bugging the crap out of me but everytime I confronted him about it he would laugh and say he had no idea what I was talking about.

Last night was ladies night at one of my favorite clubs on the northside and so a few of us from work decided to go since we had the next morning off.

Daniel came along.

I decided to ignore him --- since he was deciding to act like an idiot towards me. I was dancing alone ---Tasha had just gone to get us another round of whiskey sours--- when I felt a man's body pressing tight against my backside.

"I love the way you move." His familiar voice sent shivers down my spine and it took everything in me not to run away from his advance.

Daniel's arm wrapped around my waist, pulling me impossibly closer. The darkness of the club, the deep bass pulsing through my body, did nothing to hide the hardness pressing into my lower back. He all but growled in my ear as his hand traveled up the front of my thin linen shirt to tease the skin just under my breast. I gasped.

"Something wrong?" Despite his confident tone, I knew he was asking permission. I shook my head.

We continued moving together, his hands roaming...teasing...until Tasha came back with the drinks. He disappeared as soon as she was in sight.

She looked at me, confused when I told her I needed to sit down. From where we sat, I could see the bar---Daniel was leaned back, casually, against it talking to one of the guys from work. He kept his eyes locked on me the entire conversation.

My head was spinning and I was fighting so hard to tamp down on the arousal I could feel building inside me. I wanted him. And he fucking *knew* it.

Well, since he was trying to mess with my head, I decided to mess right back. Scanning the dance floor, I found my target and headed for the first handsome, single male I saw. The smile the stranger gave me let me know he was willing and I immediately felt a little guilty for using him.

The song seemed to last FOREVER as I kept glancing over my shoulder to make sure I was still being watched. It worked. Daniel's smug grin turned into a grimace as he watched me grind against---I have no idea what the guy's name was, though I know he told me---him. As soon as it was over, I thanked smiled and excused myself, feeling a little dizzy from the drinks, and headed outside to clear my head and catch a cab.

"I never figured you as a coward."

I spun to face him, feeling rage boiling to the surface. How dare he??? After all the stupid, childish games he'd been playing...to call *me* the coward! But when I turned my rage turned to something else entirely.

I remember it felt like we stood there, without moving, for like five minutes. His expression was furious, as I'm sure mine was and then...he grabbed my face with both of his hands and kissed me. And, this was not the sweet, chaste kiss that he had given me before.

It was primal, completely unbridled, lust. I could taste the liquor on his tongue---sweet and warm---and I wanted more.

The car pulled up behind me and he ushered me in throwing some money at the cabbie before muttering an address and then kissing me again.

We ended up at his house and...well, I guess you can figure out what happened after that.

When he fell asleep, I got myself together and went home.

All day I debated on what to do...he hasn't called, of course and I have no idea what to do next.

Sex With My Clothes On

Elated would be the understatement of the year for how I felt when I saw him across the room after we found a booth in the bar area. I excused myself, trying to ignore the glares of betrayal on my friends' faces, and sauntered over to him. As I got closer to where he was, leaning back casually against the bar in jeans and a loose-fitting salmon colored button-up, I started having second-thoughts.

What the hell was I thinking? He was this gorgeous, charming, suave Latin hottie who was also an exceptional dancer that probably had a hundred women lining up for a chance to be with him....And here I was planning on walking up to him, expecting him to what???

I stopped about ten feet from him and laughed once at myself in disgust. Turning away from him, I took two steps back towards Jayne and Mandy's table and froze.

"Abigail?" The way my name flowed off his tongue had my heart racing. He remembered me????? Spinning slowly to face him--afraid to make any sudden movement--I saw him walking towards me with the smile I had seen every night in my sleep. It was a thousand times more perfect in person, though.

"Buenos noches," he welcomed in his native tongue, kissing my cheek lightly. Of course, I flushed immediately. "Back for another dance?"

"Is that an invitation?" I was amazed at my coherency.

Pedro's gaze penetrated me. "Yes."

We moved together across the floor effortlessly, at least that's how it felt for me. There was something about him, the way I felt when he held me, that was like a drug. So, when Pedro stopped moving, staring over my shoulder at someone, it took me awhile to come down long enough to figure out what was wrong. "I think your friend is needing you."

I looked towards the direction of his interest to see Jayne standing there, looking very uncomfortable. Pedro squeezed my hand and excused himself, but I clung to him greedily.

"It's okay, Abby," he assured me. "You can join me upstairs, if you wish."

I nodded, unable to form a verbal response before he disappeared.

Jayne told me that they needed to go. When I informed her I'd be staying she was worried--we always watched out for each other in these situations. We worked out a compromise--I would text her when I got home--and hugged goodbye.

As soon as she was out the door I all but sprinted to the bathroom to make sure I didn't look a mess. Spinning around, making sure my knee-length ruffled, turquoise dress wasn't like tucked into my underwear or something embarrassing like that, and smoothing down my stick-straight hair, I walked nervously up the stairs.

The spiral staircase was no picnic in stiletto sandals, but I made it--and the reward was highly worth it. Because lounging, all alone in the vast loft, on an enormous brown leather sofa was Pedro, grinning ear to ear.

He stood as I approached him. "Dance with me?"

But this dance was much different than the fast-paced rhythm of salsa. He had one hand tangled in my hair, our faces so close I could taste the sweetness of his breath, while the other was low on my back. One of his legs was positioned between mine, rubbing sensually against an intimate spot. The songs were switching but our movements never ceased....And then we were up against the wall.

His mouth was hot and wet as it covered mine, tasting me. I groaned when his thigh rubbed me harder and sucked his tongue deep into my mouth. His graceful fingers were riding up under my dress, caressing my inner thigh, pinching my nipples through the cotton fabric still shielding them.

I reached down and cupped him through the denim there. His hips bucked which made the sensation against my sex torturous and I bit my lip as he did it again and again. "Come for me, hermosa."

I remember him covering my mouth with his again and screaming down his throat as my body rocked with my climax. He had to carry my limp body over to the couch when my legs turned to jelly. I don't know how long I laid against him there, but I awoke to the sound of his voice speaking Spanish whispers in my ear and feeling more rested than I had since the night I'd first visited this place.

"Pedro?"

"Mmm-hmm?"

"I need to get home."

"Why?"

I laughed, and was so close to just giving in that I scared myself. What was it about him? "Because I have to try to get some more rest before I go to work in," I stopped and looked around for the clock unsuccessfully, "well...soon."

He offered to drive me, but I somehow managed to politely decline with a promise to come see him again soon.

Dancing

About a week ago, some of the girls from work were dying to go to this new Cuban restaurant/bar because everyone was raving about their sangrias and huge dance floor where people were on hand to give free salsa lessons on the spot.

It was everything everyone had told us it would be. The atmosphere was thrumming with excitement and sensuality. And the weather outside had gotten colder so the warmth of the restaurant was pleasant.

Around ten, we piled onto the dance floor and started rocking our bodies to the hypnotic rhythm. I don't know how much time had passed when he came up behind me.

"You know, I can show you moves that are even more fun than this," he whispered in a heavy, Latin accent.

I stopped and turned to face him. "Excuse me?". What the fuck kind of pickup line was that?

He put up his dark hands in surrender and I noticed how graceful they looked. His eyes were so light blue in color that they looked ethereal. "I'm one of the dance instructors, Pedro, and I wanted to offer you a lesson."

When he smiled, his teeth gleamed, contrasting starkly to the rich caramel color of his skin. I stuttered an acceptance and took his outstretched hand as he led me to an open section of the floor.

Pedro's wrapped one arm around my waist and pressed me tight against him. "Have you ever done this before?" The double entendre wasn't lost on me. I shook my head, smiling shyly. "Ahhhh," he breathed into my ear as he began moving us to the beautiful music, "A virgin. You moved so well before"--he had been watching me?--"I think you'll enjoy this very much."

I became so aroused at that moment it was embarrassing. I was mortified of the flush that was claiming my skin; my entire body felt like it would burst into flame at any second.

The dance ended much too soon for me. Pedro kissed my hand swiftly before whispering something in Spanish I didn't understand and heading up the staircase to a VIP area I had seen other dancers in.

Fast forward several sleepless nights to this past Monday, and I all but demanded that Jayne and Mandy try the Cuban place out again. I knew the chance of Pedro being there again was poor, but I owed it to my health (I had become a walking zombie since that night) to at least try and find him again....(CONTINUED IN SEX WITH MY CLOTHES ON)

Talking

I met Daniel at Starbucks the day after he text me. We had breakfast and sat in companionable silence while we ate and sipped our non-fat cappuccinos.

"I like you. You know that, right?"

I had no idea what to say to that so I just sat there looking like a deer caught in headlights.

He laughed. "Sorry, I know that was blunt, but I didn't know if you understood or
not."

"Understand what?"

His face grew very serious. "I like being with you. A lot."

"Daniel." I had to stop him before this went too far. "I don't want to hurt you."

"Then don't." He smiled but the humor never reached his eyes.

"I'm not ready for any kind of relationship right now. I am in a new place in my life and I'm not ready move on yet."

I looked up from my hands, not even brave enough to look him in the eye as I said it. I expected him to look angry or dejected. Instead, he seemed thoughtful. "What?" I asked after a long silence.

"It's just this place where you are now. Are there any other men in it?"

After considering my options, I went with the truth. "Yes. Lots of them," I said with a smirk. I tried not to laugh at the shocked expression on his face. "I have never just gone on dates without getting in a relationship before. No strings involved."

"And now?"

I felt myself blush and nodded. "And now, I find that I flourish under those conditions. I am finding out things about myself that I never knew."

"What if I said I wanted to take you out? No strings attached."

I raised one eyebrow, incredulous now. "But you don't want that," I stated plainly.

"You don't know what I want," he muttered like he was speaking to himself.

"I don't want to hurt you.". I felt it crucial to get that message across. "You deserve better than me."

I didn't know what to make of his bitter laugh then.

"If we didn't work together, would you go out with me?"

"No strings?"

"Nope."

I grinned. "Most definitely."

"So work is a string?"

"Yep. It would be a little awkward, don't you think?"

"Only if you made it that way," he said pointedly.

"So what are you saying. We can't just be friends any more?"

"No," he paused before adding, "I want a little more."

I sighed, leaning back in my chair. "I can't give you more."

He shifted in his seat, leaning into the space I'd just vacated. "What if I wanted benefits, too. There's no strings for that is there?"

"You're serious?" I said, my voice dripping with sarcasm.

"Completely."

"Work would still be a problem," I reminded him.

"Why?" he asked, putting on an innocent expression.

"Because the benefits could be...lost. And anyway why are you so interested in the benefits?"

He smirked. "I think the better question is why are you?"

He pushed away from the table. "I'll see you at work."

Birthday Surprise

So, as I've written before, my ex-husband and I still have the occasional tryst from time to time...this is one of those times.

Last week, I was uh....watching something online :) I am still a little embarrassed at the level of my arousal (and the fact that I was too tired to leave the house for some real-life excitement) that got me looking up sites I'd never heard of before. Anyways, I saw a clip of a woman giving a BJ to a guy from underneath his desk, with ppl in the room that had no clue what was going on.

It was actually something I used to kid my ex about...well, that was no longer an idle threat. I knew that he was working on his birthday and so I planned it out and snuck into his office (he is a supervisor at a sporting goods warehouse). When he came in from lunch I was in my spot under his desk (thank GOD it went down far enough to cover my feet). He sat down and I waited for my moment: his phone rang. A huge grin spread across my face when I realized it was something that would keep him talking for awhile.

When I ripped his zipper down, he jumped but kept talking. I pulled his limp penis out of the opening in his boxers and started working it in my hand. I realized that he had no idea who it was, and I knew that should bother me...but I wasn't exactly a saint in that department so whatever.

His voice cracked just a little when I put my lips on him and licked the head in a figure eight, savoring the taste I had come to know so well. A hand reached down and yanked lightly at my hair: he knew it was me.

I cupped his balls, knowing it would get him dripping into my mouth. It did.

And then, I began.

I heard his fist come down on the surface above my head as I took him in my mouth and slid my lips down until they touched the base of his cock. My hands traveled up his thighs before reaching around to his ass, pulling him to me. He got the hint and began bucking into my mouth, thrusting it as much as the edge of his desk would allow while maintaining a professional facade with his client.

The wheels on his chair started creaking as he fucked my face. He choked out an excuse to get off the phone, which was smart on his part because he came down my throat less than twenty seconds later. His expletives came out in a harsh whisper as I milked him dry.

Finally, I peeked my head out from under the desk, wiped off the stray drop that had landed on my chin, and walked out the door. When I turned my phone back on (having turned it off to keep my presence a secret), he had left me a voicemail saying "Thank you for the thoughtful gift" and that he owed me one.

The idea kept me (and my hand) up all night :)

Good job

So I know I've been trying to catch you up on my blog but I have to tell you something that happened at the gym today...my close friend who is a trainer at MaxFitness also was really sick. I told her not to worry and I would take her clients for her. I am very wicked because I knew that one of those was a player for the local major league baseball team and SO delicious.

No, I didn't get his number, by he DOES have mine now :) I guess my post-workout massage did the trick!!!

Later...

I received a phone call from him two weeks ago—just three days after he'd shown up in front of my building. It was unseasonably warm reaching ninety degrees that afternoon. Anson invited me over after my morning shift because he was having some friends over to do some grilling and swim in his pool, which he was breaking in after having it built over the winter.

Jayne and Shelley joined me, but Mandy couldn't make it. They had no problem getting reacquainted with the men from that night at the club. We had a great time eating fresh guacamole, smoky BBQ, and drinking lots of light beer. I was a little self-conscious of the gorgeous women around me when I got down to my orange bikini, but the way Anson looked at me as I came out of the house made me feel better about it.

We played water volleyball and then lounged while the guys checked the scores of the college basketball games. Finally, the sun had set. Jayne and Shelley excused themselves because they had been asked by the others "oh-so-conveniently" to go see a movie.

Not too long afterwards, I found myself lying back against Anson in one his chaise loungers, listening to the sound of Rascal Flatts coming over the outdoor speakers, and feeling completely relaxed.

"Now, this is my definition of nice," he whispered and I could feel his lips curve into a smile against my hair while he traced patterns on my bare stomach with his index finger.

"I agree."

"I've missed you."

He felt me tense up and rubbed my arm. "No strings, I know. I just felt like telling you."

I sighed and pretended he hadn't said anything. Hoisting myself from his warmth, I walked over to the pool to clear my mind. And then I decided to try something new. Anson watched me with a curious look on his face. I pulled off my top and bottoms, threw him a wink, and dove into the cool water.

When I came up for air, he was standing at the edge of the pool, looking at me with an expression of awe.

"It feels nice," I called as seductively as possible. And it worked, he stripped off his trunks and dove in gracefully. I met him halfway, noticing the silver streaks the moonlight put in his hair. "And this," I cooed, rubbing my chest against his, "feels nice, too."

Anson shook his head. "No. Not nice. This," I gasped as his hand stroked my inner thigh, "is very naughty. Have you ever done anything like this before?"

I grinned as I remembered back to a night that seemed like a different lifetime; a simple romp in the hot tub. But we had been seated, and the water had been hot. "No."

"Good." He kissed me then and I wrapped my legs around his waist so he could swim us over to the side. With my back pressed into the wall and the tips of my toes skimming the bottom, we were able to start grinding.

I thought I remembered the way he felt before, but he felt thicker somehow. Maybe it was the water we glided in, but each thrust was heaven and there was absolutely no pain when he hiked one of my legs over his shoulder to bury himself further.

"Oh God, Anson...please...please don't stop."

"Wasn't...planning on it." I felt his arms strain as his fingers dug into the cement behind me and fucked me even faster.

I started screaming at the sensation and one of his hands quickly covered my mouth. "I've got neighbors, baby," he chuckled, never breaking rhythm.

"Sorry," I breathed into his hand.

"It's ok, but I have to confess something."

"What?"

"If I don't stop soon my whole body is gonna cramp up."

I moaned as his bucking ceased. Keeping him inside me with my iron-clad leg grip, we relaxed against each other. "I'm not ready to leave yet," I whispered against his neck before placing tiny kisses there.

"Then what do you want to do?" He waggled his eyebrows.

"Well, I was thinking of how nice it felt over on the chaise..."

"Yeah..."

"I was thinking I might like to"—Oh my gosh, did I really have the nerve to say it?—"be conquered on it."

His head tilted slightly, the corners of his mouth twitching. "Conquered? You mean, like, with you in front and me...?"

I nodded and suckled down to the hollow of his throat.

He pushed himself up out of the water and then pulled me up with him before throwing me over his shoulder and dumping me on the chair, face down. His weight knocked the wind out of me, crushing my breasts into the mattress beneath. "You sure you want me to conquer you, Abigail?"

"God, yes. Make me your fuck slave..." Somehow it didn't sound near as corny as I thought it would.

He lifted off of me briefly before pulling my hips up so my ass was pointed to the sky. I was breathing so hard I could barely hear the music anymore. My legs were violently shoved apart and then there was nothing.

"Please, Anson. I want you ins--" His hand was suffocating me and he pulled me roughly to his chest.

"You will not talk unless I give you permission. And if you don't comply there will be punishment."

His words and terrifying tone sent shivers through me. I was dripping, so much that I was sure it would stain the mattress. I nodded my head--tough to do with my chin still in his vice grip. He threw my upper body forward and I barely caught my self before he was thrusting inside. It went in without problem considering how wet I had become.

This was by far my favorite position. Relinquishing 100% of the control...but I had never had any lover besides my ex talk to me the way he was...I loved it. In fact, I was loving it too much because I was almost there already.

And then he changed it. Putting one hand on either cheek, he pulled my ass apart and slowed down his strokes just a little.

"What are you doing? Oh!". He smacked my ass so hard I knew there would be a handprint.

"I told you what would happen if you spoke without my permission," he growled, completely still. I waited, anticipating when he would thrust but he stayed motionless. A minute or two must have passed before he grabbed a handful of my hair and pulled me back against his chest. I was impressed--and hyperaroused--that he was able to keep it inside me at that angle. His hands squeezed my breasts before yanking on my nipples. It was impossible not to cry out!

He pushed me back down and started fucking me so brutally I thought he might penetrate my womb.

"Tell me how good my cock feels!" he commanded, the words coming out awkwardly between thrusts.

I wanted to cry with relief at being able to voice my pleasure. I had always been very loud in bed so this was torture... "Your cock feels amazing," I said through gritted teeth.

"I'm gonna cum in you." I gripped the mattress even tighter knowing he would be going even harder now. "OH FUCK!" he growled unloading into me. After his body relaxed, he rolled me over and laid on top of me.

"So...," he laughed. "That was..."

"Nice?"

He grinned and pressed a kiss to my nose. "Anything but, actually."

"I have to leave soon." I wondered how he would take this, but he simply nodded before getting up and handing me the discarded scraps of clothing.

His phone rang as we walked to my car and I was grateful there would be no awkward goodbye scene.

When I pulled out my phone, I saw a text had popped up from Daniel that just read "let's talk"...

Remembering a Non-commitment commitment (part 2)

After my new exploration, we got in the shower and just had a make-out session...no kinkiness and I have to say it was really nice. I wasn't planning on him staying the night but the sun was already coming up. I puttered around the house until he finally got the hint and left with a smile.

The rest of the week flew by at the gym. Two of my clients were training for the big, local marathon and I had another two clients bump up to 4 sessions/week from 3. I was exhausted by the time Friday night rolled around. Most of the trainers went out for dinner and drinks after so I joined them. Daniel was there, of course, and we had fun. There had been no weirdness between us after going to dinner, which I was thankful for.

A few of them had too much to drink so I let them come back to my condo to crash. Daniel insisted on coming, too just to make sure I got home safely. What could I do?

When we got to the entrance of my building I froze.

"Abby!" He jumped up from where he'd been sitting like a bum on the sidewalk. I saw Daniel's spine stiffen out of the corner of my eye.

"Hi. Um, what are you doing here?". I tried not sound unpleasant but this was completely unexpected.

He was looking at Daniel who still had his hand at the small of my back; sizing him up. "I was downtown and thought I'd stop by, but you didn't answer your cell so I figured I'd just wait for you."

I could feel all 5 pairs of eyes on me now. And there was no telling what Daniel was thinking about all this right now. I definitely didn't want to think about why that was bothering me so much, either. I had to get inside where I could sort this out in private.

"Well," I started uncertainly. "Let's all get inside then". I tried not to see the triumphantly smug grin he gave Daniel.

"Okay, what the he'll are you doing here?" I seethed, whirling on him after I closed the door. "And I don't appreciate you lying about having cell number."

"What are you talking about?". Despite my rage he had remained less than a foot away from me. "You gave me your number at the bar."

"What?" I had no memory of that. "Why in the world would I have given you my number when #1, we left together, and #2 I never give my number out to men. I am not looking for a relationship. I was pretty sure I made at least that much clear."

He looked down and for the first time appeared to be unsure of himself. "I know," he mumbled to the floor. "But, I can't get what we did out of my head."

I had heard that one before. But it had never led to stalking. What was it about a woman freed from inhibition that made her so desirable? No one before my husband had ever shown me this kind of attention.

"Anson, I'm glad to hear you had a good time with me...I had a nice time, too."

"Just nice? So what, you do stuff like that all the time?"

Oh no! Tell me he did not just say that! "Are you implying that I'm a slut?"

Immediately his hands went up and he was reaching for me. "No, no, no!" He sighed heavily. "It's just that...Look I don't know, but what we did was more than nice," he said making the short word sound distasteful. His green eyes were burning with intensity as he glared at me. "And you know it, too."

I felt an unwanted blush creep up my neck as I remembered the way he felt inside me, touching places that had gone unexplored before that night. Why was the room so fucking hot all of a sudden? "I need some air, Anson. I think you should go, too."

I moved to open the door but he beat me to it, pressing my body into the cool wood while his arms entrapped me. My heart rate accelerated as his eyes roved over my body; I knew what he was remembering. He slowly inclined his head towards me, and I could not get my brain to function properly. This should not happen!

A loud banging on the door I was up against had us jumping away from it.

"Abby! Hey, is everything okay?" Daniel's voice sounded furious, but I had never been so relieved.

"Yeah," I cleared my throat to make it sound more confident. "Yeah, Daniel. Everything's fine. I'll be right out."

"Okay." I could hear his footsteps stamping away down the hall.

Anson was glowering at the blank door. "Who is that?"

"A friend," I stood in front of him, blocking his view of the doorway. "Not that it's any of your business, anyway. Do you not remember anything I said to you Saturday?"

"Which part?"

"The part about me being drunk."

He grimaced. "Yes."

"Why do you think I mentioned that?"

He shook his head. "You're saying you don't want to be involved with me."

"No," I answered in a softer tone to attempt to make my voice sound less harsh. "I don't want to be involved with anyone right now. It's nothing personal."

He considered this a moment before looking back at me with obvious resentment. "It felt pretty fucking personal to me."

Geez! What was it going to take to convince him? "You went home with a girl who had obviously had way too much to drink and you're telling me you actually thought there were personal feelings involved?"

He turned and glared at the door again. "Is it that guy in there?"

"No."

Anson nodded his head and faced me, believing me for once. "What if I made you a deal then?"

My interest peaked. "A deal?"

"No strings attached, of course."

"Isn't that what a deal is?"

"No," he said, his shoulders shaking lightly as he laughed. "A deal is all about conditions."

"And what, may I ask, are these 'conditions'?"

"You and I could continue doing things like...we did Saturday night,"---a tingle traveled down my spine at the memory---"But we are free to date other people, too."

"Are you serious?"

"If it means getting to be with you again."

I approached him slowly, taking his massive hand in my own. "Anson, it's sweet of you to call it a deal, but that's already how I live my life." Then, I amended, "Ever since my divorce anyway."

"Wait, so you mean you would've gone out with me if I'd asked you?"

"Of course. But just to let loose and enjoy your company. Nothing more than that."

"Well, damn, I can handle that!" He pulled me to him roughly, but I placed my palms flat against his chest to keep him away.

"Are you sure? What about guys like Daniel?"

Something flashed across his eyes for half a second before he composed himself again. "What about them?"

"You wouldn't have a problem with me going out with someone like that, too?"

"As long as when you're with me, you're with me," he growled playfully, pushing my arms away to wrap me up. His lips felt warm as he pressed his lips firmly to the top of my head.

"Okay with me," the sound was muffled against his chest and we both laughed. "I really need to go be a hostess now."

"What are ya'll doing?"

"Well, they're staying here because they can't drive home or afford the cab fare uptown."

He released me enough to search my eyes. "All of them?"

My eyes narrowed; he gave me a wry smile. "I will call you."

"Sounds good," I answered, standing on my tiptoes to kiss him on the lips. His hands on my ass made me gasp and he took advantage by shoving his tongue down my throat. My protests turned into moans as he lifted me off the ground and pressed me into the wall. Not needing his hands anymore, they started roaming under my t-shirt, pulling at the cups on my bra to get beneath the fabric.

The sound of laughter coming from the other room brought me back to reality, and what I was almost contemplating doing. I went limp to get free, watching with amusement as his mind tried to process what had just happened.

"I need to go back out there now," I panted, while combing my fingers through my hair to try and make myself look presentable enough to face Daniel without guilt. I groaned mentally. Why was guilt even associated with him? He might not have any feelings for me anyway!

"Okay," he said and reached for the doorknob. Without looking my way he said, "But we're finishing this later."

Remembering My Non-Commitment Commitment (PART 1)

Saturday morning after my "non-date" with Daniel, I realized I had been thinking about him non-stop...That was a bad sign. I remembered all too clearly what happened when I fell in love and it wasn't pretty. People got hurt.

So, I decided I needed a girls' night...and it wouldn't hurt if an attractive man was thrown into the mix.

Bar-hopping seemed the best way to do this, so Jayne, Mandy, and Shelley came over the night and we walked the three blocks to the clubs. After listening to one of our favorite local alt-rock bands, we proceeded to get sloshed on amaretto sours and shots (3-wise men). It was around 2am when we ran into them. They were absurdly charming, in their mid-thirties, and down for a good time. Jayne met Todd and Ky on the dance floor and brought them back to our table. Ten minutes later they went to fetch their mates, Anson and Lance from the dance floor who had been dancing with none other than Mandy and Shelley. Somehow, I ended up with the accountant (a first for me)...only he didn't fit the part. Surfer, yes. Bartender, maybe. But accountant? I couldn't believe it.

We were laughing hysterically at everything anyone said (hello, we were WASTED) and then I felt Anson's hand creeping up my thigh over the denim of my jeans. "Wanna get out of here?" he breathed into my ear, his tongue darting out to tease my earlobe in the process.

I looked at him and nodded stupidly. "Jayne, we're going for a walk." I think she may not have heard me considering the way her dance partner was kissing her.

I grabbed his hand and pulled him out into the crisp, March night. The cool air was desperately needed after the suffocating humidity of the smoky, tightly packed club. We were halfway down the walk, when he pushed me roughly into the brick--still in plain sight of the patrons making their way to the parking garage. The kiss was hungry and rough--and I wondered what was bringing this ferocity out in him because I good idea what was doing it for me...no, I told myself I wasn't going to think like that right now.

When we finally came up for air, I invited him to come home with me since it was only a couple of blocks away. His flashed his brilliant white teeth at me, almost growling as he told me to lead the way.

We didn't make it farther than the dining room off to the right of my entryway. He sat in one of the chairs and pulled me to straddle him, unfastening the ties that held my halter up. Anson's mouth roamed from my mouth down to my newly exposed breasts. He bit hard on one of the nipples before sucking it into his mouth.

I hadn't realized how long it had been since my last sexual experience. Months. No wonder last night had been so hard.

I almost came right then.

He picked me up, switching breasts as my legs wrapped around his middle. I hadn't noticed in the bar how muscular he was, but he had to be strong to carry my solid, 170lbs up the stairs and into my bedroom.

We crashed on top of the crimson and gold duvet and he ripped my pants down violently before unzipping himself.

"You do know I'm completely drunk, right?"

He paused and looked down at me, his green eyes wild with arousal. "You want me to stop?"

I shook my head sharply and laughed. "I just thought you should know."

He was on top of me again, his cock pressing desperately, just above my entrance. "Protection," he groaned and sucked on the skin just below my earlobe--another gush flooded my sex.

"I've already taken care of it. Fuck me." I grabbed his chin to make sure he understood. "Now."

He beamed at me again, and thrust in deep. I screamed in pain at being stretched after such a long hiatus. I felt him start to pull away. "Don't you dare," I growled and dug my fingernails into his bare shoulders. I must have surprised him, then, because he gasped when I wrapped my legs around him and pulled myself off the bed to push him back inside.

"Holy shit," he moaned and pressed me back down, fucking hard and fast. I tried not to think of him, but I was only human and Daniel's face floated in my mind's eye just for a few milliseconds before I pushed it away.

Less than two minutes into it, I felt myself climaxing.

"God, you are so tight. Fuck, I can feel every thing you are doing," he moaned between thrusts.

"Then you better not stop."

And he didn't. We lay there, completely sated for a few minutes before my body began getting aroused at the sight of his tanned, statuesque body soaking my sheets with his sweat. "You okay?" I asked, even as I felt his heart rate slow beneath my fingers.

"Never better," he replied, throwing a smirk in my direction.

"In that case...". I got up and straddled him, but faced away from him.

"What do you think you're doing?" he questioned playfully. His hands glided from my ass up to the small circular tattoo just below the top of my spine.

"I've always wanted to try this." I impaled myself on him, being careful not to bend his impressively long dick as I slid down on it. The sensation was unlike anything I'd ever experienced as it reached unexplored places inside my body.

I wanted more. I pulled his knees up, placing my hands atop them for balance and then leaned as far back as I could--his breath was tantalizingly close to my neck again--and I bucked. My hips felt disconnected from my brain, rocking furiously to a rhythm I could never have come up with on my own. I was going tribal on him and he let me know it.

He let a stream of expletives and his hands gripped the sides of my waist for dear life. I didn't know it was possible, but I brought myself to climax again.

"What the fuck did I get myself into?" he panted as I fell back against him. He kissed the back of my head and reached around to softly caress my breasts.

"Did you like that?" A more stupid question had never been uttered; he laughed accordingly.

END PART 1

Confused

I know I am blogging way after the fact but I feel the need to catch you up on the important things you've missed lately.

A week after Daniel crashed at my house he walked me to my car after our night shift. I had a feeling I'd known what was coming but it didn't make it easier. He was making small talk about one of my uppity over-tanned clients when we got to my car. Talking to him was so easy.

And then he looked at me nervously and I broke out in a sweat.

"So I was wondering if you had plans Friday night?"

"Uh..." What if I'm wrong and he just wants to hang out? "No. Not yet."

He smiled shyly, the dimples in his cheeks showing through. "Well, I was wondering if you'd let me buy you dinner."

"Daniel..."

He put a hand up to stop me. "Consider it my way of making up for passing out at your place the other night."

"I thought that's what breakfast was for." I was stalling---I didn't know what to do. He was a good friend and I didn't want to hurt him. But if this was just to make up for the other night then it would be fun to just go and hang out with him.

"Abby, I made you breakfast using things in your kitchen. It wasn't much of a gift," he said laughing lightly.

"Okay. What time?"

He picked me up at eight and then drove us to a small, family-owned Italian place down the block from my condo. It was fantastic and turned out to be a very pleasant night. Being with him was effortless, and I laughed more than I had in years. We had so much in common outside of work--something I would never have guessed. Before I knew it the place was closing up.

We arrive back at my place minutes later and things started getting...complicated. I made sure I only had one glass of wine on purpose. I needed all my wits about me to make sure and keep him at arm's length.

We sat in his car in front of my building. He had worn a cranberry colored shirt with a charcoal tie and his sun-bleached hair fell in an adorable mess across his deep blue eyes.

"This was fun," I started and playfully rubbed my middle to show how full I was. "I think we are definitely even now. I didn't even know that place existed!"

"Yeah, me neither. One of my client's suggested it."

And then, for the first time that night, the silence between us became awkward. Should I invite him up? Would he take it the wrong way? Looking at his full lips, part of me really wanted him to.

He put the car in park, turned off the headlights, and came around to open my door for me. "Madam?"

I giggled in spite of myself and took his extended hand. The awkwardness faded as I remembered who this was. He guided me sweetly up to my floor and walked me to my door. "Thank you."

I stared at him curiously. "For what?"

"Letting me pay you back. This was nice." I noticed--as his sapphire eyes focused on mine--that, in my heels, we were the same height.

"Yeah," was my witty comeback as I willed my heart rate to slow to normal. "I had a good time."

He leaned in and I could smell the faint scent of his cologne, something slightly citrus that was heavenly mixed with his personal chemistry. I closed my eyes and felt his lips press a feather-light kiss on my cheek. When I opened them again he rewarded me with a crooked smile.

"Good night."

"'Night."

Housewarming

6 months ago I had finally saved enough money to feel comfortable buying one of the new luxury condos downtown. It was a tedious process but after getting out of my lease, negotiating a mortgage, and then actually going through the moving process, I was home.

My girl Jayne helped me throw a huge housewarming party which was a surreal night. Most of the people from the gym were there along with my sister, Alexa, and my twin cousins, Tawna and Lily and their significant others. How I fit 35+ in my 1500sqft home I will never know but it was...wow.

I had catering and a bartender and DJ and lots of good-looking people :)

Everyone danced and then we had a DDR tournament (which is 100x more fun when participants are tipsy). After that we just chilled and the next thing I knew it was 3 in the morning and time to clear everyone out.

It took awhile but Jayne and I finally had all but one person out. Daniel.

In case you don't remember, Daniel was the one I spent a good portion of the Christmas 07 party with. Well, we'd stayed good friends but never progressed further--which I was a little grateful for because getting involved with a coworker was very dangerous. Plus, I still wasn't ready to settle down, nor am I now either.

Anyways, we noticed that Daniel was still passed out on the upstairs couch. I approached him slowly, shaking his shoulder but getting no response. He was breathing normally so I wasn't concerned and told Jayne to go on home; I would just let him sleep it off and then make sure he got home okay in the morning.

The next morning I was relieved to find a was hang-over free :). I walked down the stairs but froze when I got halfway down. Someone was in my kitchen! Then I remembered Daniel and my heart re-started. When I came around the corner he was standing in front of my stove in his rumpled clothes cooking something that smelled amazing.

"I hope you don't mind," he said and grinned sheepishly. "I wanted to do something to make up for crashing here last night and I remembered how much you enjoyed a big breakfast.

Wow. He remembered what I told him off-hand like over a year ago? "Thanks."

I noticed him averting his eyes quickly a light blush in his cheeks. It was adorable. And then I started feeling self-conscious of the braless condition I was in.

We sat and ate with easy conversation and I was a little sad when it was time for him to go. I walked him to the door and had a strong urge to say let's do this again soon but we were coworker and...I just wasn't ready.

He turned to look at me, halfway out the door and then stepped towards me so fast I couldn't move away if I'd wanted. He pecked me softly on the cheek, his hand combing through my hair, and then he disappeared down the hall.

Long time coming...

So it's been awhile since I last blogged. And for good reason. My job at the gym has kept me crazy busy and my ex has been driving me insane!!!!

I have barely had time to keep my apartment clean let alone find time to hang with my girls of date...it's very sad when I actually think about it. But the good news is I am doing phenomenally at my job with more high-end clients than anyone else.

And so a week ago I hit a point where my world seemed to be getting back to a calmer pace. That's why I'm back! And despite the lack of dating time I do have a story or two...and I have a feeling there will be lots more to come :)